**Warning. Super long post**
Love. One of the most simple words. Yet one of the hardest things to say. The worst and best thing that could ever happen to you. Now I know I may be a hopeless romantic and over time I have become hard towards "love" but some how I have managed to become one of the happiest humans on the planet because I found love. Over time I built a tall tall wall around my heart. I locked it up and kept it away from anything. I had at one point thought I was in "love." May sound dumb when I am only in high school but I grew an attachment to someone that I thought would be around for a long time. But I got hurt. And I didn't know how to handle myself with anyone. I didn't know how to trust anyone. Now I am not putting any blame on anyone, because we both made mistakes. But it still was hard for me to move on. Then one day I woke up and realized that I had something better there. Something that could help me. SOMEONE who could heal my little bruised up heart. I honestly was terrified to let someone in. And I didn't want to take the chance and have something go wrong and lose my best friend. But I did. And I couldn't be happier to of made that decision. I honestly gave up on the idea of being happy in that way. I always told myself that there would be a chance that I would be alone for a very long time. And I was okay with that. I'm not saying you have to have another person in your life to make you happy because no one will come into your life in that way until you are happy with yourself. But I waited and I finally got what I had been secretly wishing for.
(Now I am sorry I am being one of those cheesy girls who talks about her lover boy but sometimes I can't help it.)
I wanted to talk about my best friend, the boy who healed me and made me forget about every bad thing that happened to me in the past, the kid who has stopped me from giving up. I want to talk about Jeremy Peterson. And I wanted to say thank you. Thank you for everything you have done for me because I don't know where I would be if it wasn't for you. Because before I was fighting a battle within myself. And I was lost. But you took my hand and you started to lead me down a better road. So thank you.
Now guys. Can I just say hes pretty great. I mean not only is he freakishly attractive, but he treats me right. He is my best friend and he is my boy twin. Weird right? But its true he acts just like me. And he finishes my sentences and thinks the same things I do (really scary most of the time). I just have grown to love...LOVE. And I have forgiven my past. And I have learned to accept the person I am. I don't wake up with a hatred for the world. (which is weird considering how he actually hates everyone...not really...but still) My parents also actually like him. Like a LOT, that's a first for any guy I have ever liked. Especially my dad. Its the weirdest thing but I have to have my dads approval on a guy. I guess you could say that's cute....He's liked by basically my whole family.
I use to talk about how I hated love and how I didn't believe in it. But then my friend's Caela and Darek just made me SO mad because they are the cutest couple and secretly I was jealous. I also always talked about how much I hated Valentines day. I have never ever had a good one. I still think its a worthless dumb holiday but I now have a tolerance for it. This year everything was a surprise. I dressed up in a fancy outfit and sat patiently in my living room. I was actually kind of nervous. Which is weird considering it was just a date with Jeremy and I spend every day with him...but for some reason I was FREAKING out. Then I hear a knock and in walks in a super stud dressed in a nice little suit with red tulips (because I HATE roses and think they are tacky and cliche) and a big red heart box of chocolates (dying because I have an addiction to chocolate) Then of course I make my mom be awkward and take funny pictures of us outside and with my sisters. Then we were off! We ended up at Olive Garden one of my favorite restaurants. We had a super cool waiter and I ran into one of my dear friends Haley Lindley! She looked adorable. After dinner we went back to his house and we both changed out of our fancy clothes cause me and heels just do NOT work out. Then we drove around in the weirdest places talking and listening to music till we ended up on a hill over looking the city lights and we rolled down all the windows and opened the sun roof and looked at the stars. We sat there for about 3 hours talking about everything and anything possible. And can I say the best feeling is being able to talk to someone and never run out of things to say. And when you have a silence it's not awkward or weird. Anyway, we were talking when next thing we know this car pulls up and just sits there. In front of us....for about 5 minutes. Jeremy turned on his lights and then the dude started to drive away. Then Jeremy had to get curious and started to follow him. We followed him for about 10 minutes till finally it was almost curfew. It was just some weird old dude. Now I know it wasn't much but it was perfect for me. It was chill and not super crazy which is what I prefer.
I just want to tell everyone that there is someone out there for you. I am a perfect example. Someone who has liked guy's and had them never work out no matter how hard I tried to get them to last, they simply just weren't supposed too. I don't regret anyone I was "with" because they made me who I was and now they are happy with people they deserve and I am too. But no one will come into your life until you learn to love yourself. And until you learn to accept the "single" life. You need to be okay with you and just you. And when you are that's when someone will come into your life. I wish all you guys luck. And I can't wait for the day that you all find that person that you finally deserve. Thanks for reading my cheesy love post. I love you all!
Be True
Be You
Be Beautiful
Songs of the day:
A song that comes on EVERY TIME that we are driving in my car:
Our inside joke:
There are more but I don't remember them all...
Pictures (your favorite part):
OUR FIRST PICTURE AWE CUTE
Wait mega hot kid:
Valentines day (even though they are already everywhere):
Perfect.
WAIT HERE ARE MORE:
Had to laugh (too much cute)
Kay im done now, bye.
